Mouse blood.....everywhere!

I've been thinking for the last couple weeks that I haven't blogged in awhile and that when I do blog, it'll have to be a doozy to make up for the lack of. K, this one is a doozy and worth me using my precious 25 minutes of Hannah's naptime for.

At 10ish, Hannah and I were on the couch and she was nursing. I heard George (the black one) purr-meowing and crying. I could hear he was crying his way up the basement stairs and to where we were behind the couch. My first thought was, oh great, he's back to 'catching' socks and purr-meowing over his 'kill'. I ignored him because I was feeding Hannah and didn't want to disturb her. So within minutes, I'd forgotten all about George.

Just a little while ago I was in the kitchen cleaning things up and saw Eleanor trying to squeeze past the kitchen table to get to the kitty food bowls. I chuckled at her and was all, 'haha, you can't reach their food'. Then I saw what she was seeing....a dead mouse body. CRAP! I go to look closer and I see it is either a monster mouse or a shrew, but also it has its' intestines pulled out. Literally, pulled out of its' tummy! Gross - but at the same time, a little cool. I stood and inspected it for a little while, someone had spent some serious time gnawing on this little body. I grabbed an old towel that I could throw away and picked it up to dispose of it and saw there was a little puddle of goop....must have been intestine juice, LOL. So, I get another rag to clean up the goop and as I'm down on the floor, I see more clearly what had happened. 

Using my CSI forensic ability here is my determination: George brought the mostly live mouse up from the basement to his safe area in the kitchen where the dogs can't reach. Mouse was bitten and bleeding and trying to get away but George was toying with him. Blood was ALL over the kitchen floor in little globs here and there. At one point, mouse made some serious headway in escaping by going up the baseboard and wall a little bit, but he was taken down. The gutting then took the mouse out of the game. 

I'm really pretty sure it was George as he seems to be more of a killer than Henry. When I was in the kitchen cleaning up the murder scene, Henry was strutting about the kitchen with his tail high in the air. So, it could have been Henry but it was George I heard purr-meowing. I went upstairs to find George and he was laying on the bed grooming himself. Hard to say who it was, but they both got some 'good kitties' and some treats.

Shots round 2

Poor little baby girl had to get more shots today. It was her 4 month check up. The nurse saw her first and was literally giddy with how adorable Hannah was. Hannah kept smiling and cooing and laughing for the nurse. They seemed to get along great! Then the doc came in and Hannah behaved the same way for her. Such a good baby, she loves everyone :) Doc said she is doing absolutely great, no worries and everything looks super. At 4 months, she is 24 1/2 inches tall and 13.9lbs. Breast milk seems to agree with her, lol.

Then when it was time for shots, I made Lance stand by her - I couldn't do it. He said she made such an owie face, poor thing. Once the shots were done, I scooped her up for some mommy love. It only took her a little while to calm back down and realize everything was okay. I didn't cry this time at all. I knew what to expect. It was still gut-wrenching to hear my baby cry her 'OW' cry, but I'm learning to be strong :) I'm ready for a couple days of fever and crankiness now. I know from last time this is what we can expect so I'm fully prepared to snuggle her non-stop if that is what she needs.

Hannah's first cold

I think poor little punkins has her first cold. She's got a nose full of snot that I can hear and see, she had a little fever earlier this week, and a little cough that is the real cough - not the look what I can do cough. Poor thing, but then I discovered yesterday afternoon she'd given it to me. I think this is the first time I've been sick in about a year! I don't think I was ever actually sick sick while I was pg and I know I haven't been since. So I am certainly due. But as much as I'd like to go curl up in bed and stay there, I can't! That's a new one for me, LOL! This little baby could care less that I don't feel well.

This last weekend we went to mom's house for Easter weekend, so it was Hannah's first big long road trip. She was such a little trooper and did great. We got about to Rockford before she decided she'd had enough and started to snuffle and cry and before long she'd lost it entirely, her shit, that is. As long as I sat in the back with her so she could see me and let her squeeze my hands, she seemed to do better. But I felt so bad for her having to be confined and not understand why.

Once we got to mom's though everything was good. She was tired and cranky and needed to eat and go to bed but the next morning she was ready to go! I took her to go meet a bunch of old high school friends of mine for lunch and she got passed around to pretty much everyone. I think all but one of them are moms so they are totally familiar and comfortable with babies and I had no qualms about handing her over. She seemed to enjoy herself too, as long as she was being held and coo'd to. She was so comfortable in Jana's arms that she fell asleep! 

On Easter she got to meet a whole slew of relatives. She was being a little picky that day though and did good with some, but not so good with others. I'm not sure what her criteria is but she was partial to my nephew's new wife and my sister's husband but that's about it. The whole weekend I was sure she was going to roll over for the first time. She kept getting to her side and rocking a little but not quite all the way over. I think the cold she came home with has hampered her trying a little, but I think this big milestone is just around the corner. Everybody says 3 months is the norm for rolling over but then all babies progress on their own time frame, so we'll just have to wait and see. She is doing really well at sitting up though, we practice that a lot. She sits for a pretty long time before sliding down or tipping over...just like mommy :)

Franklin and his pig

When we went to pick up Franklin as a baby (puppy) we brought along this cute little pink stuffed pig thinking it would be his first toy. It turned into more than his first toy, it became more like his pacifier. He goes through about 3-4 pigs a year now, he doesn't shred them or un-stuff them so much as they literally fall apart from over-use. When he gets a new replacement pig, the first thing he does is suck on the ears and chew them off. That's it though, once the ears are removed, he is content with the pig as is.

Part of his routine is to be put to bed with a treat and his pig. In the mornings when he is let out of his kennel he always makes sure to grab his pig and bring it with him downstairs. Sometimes during the day I forget or am too lazy to take his pig and put it up for the day and I'll see him sucking on it as he naps. It wasn't until we had Hannah and I was waking up during the night for feedings that I saw how much Franklin really uses his pig. He sucks on it throughout the night and I think he does it while he's still sleeping. I would hear him and look over to see his jaw working and a little bit of pink peeking out from his mouth. How sweet!

The morning routine is for him to take his pig downstairs with him, drop it by the backdoor as he goes outside, eat, drink, and retrieve his pig to come back upstairs and lie in bed with Hannah and I. Today though, he forgot to drop his pig by the backdoor before he went out. Lance looked out the window at the dogs and saw Franklin pee-ing with his pig stuffed in his mouth. I can picture it now and it is just too funny for words. He really is a one of a kind boy.

Easter eggs!

I've been looking forward to coloring Easter eggs ever since I saw the Paas kit at the grocery store a few weeks ago. I had to call mom to remind me how to boil eggs though, not something I ever do. Strange too, considering I like boiled eggs and like deviled eggs even more...

So, Sunday was the big day - all my eggs were boiled, I'd remembered to have plenty of vinegar, Hannah was in a great mood - we were ready! She didn't really participate all that much, but I'm pretty sure she enjoyed herself. Lance wasn't entirely certain we needed to do this but once he got going, I could tell he liked it. You'll notice the blue egg underneath her Pooh Bunny. That is a window into Lance's humor....

We were talking about what our future Easters will bring and how we want to celebrate them with Hannah. What are the pieces from our childhoods we want to bring in to her childhood. Since she'll be 1 and probably a bit more mobile next Easter, we can start doing it then. One thing that I told Lance is important to me is we need to ditch the Easter ham. I hate ham and never make it. Sometimes he has a hard time letting go of how he thinks things should go so he is still considering my request for 'Easter fish' or 'Easter lasagne'. We'll see what next year brings and what I find myself cooking, lol.

Last week Hannah and I went out with a group of working moms from Meredith. They were doing some research for Parents magazine and wanted some input from new moms. I'm all about giving my opinion, so of course I jumped at the opportunity. Hannah was a really good baby and let just about every mom there hold her and coo to her with no squaks. I think it was the first time in months that I was able to eat lunch with both of my hands! It was good for both of us to interact with some people during the day. I've been wanting to but have been waiting for the weather to get a bit nicer. While I could take her out in the cold and snow, I'd really rather not. Now that it is April though, we can get some more regular outings going. It was reassuring in many ways too. Just to talk with other moms about some thoughts and feelings that are all new to me. Other moms understand :) I was talking about how different it is when our friends come over to see us and the baby vs when our relatives come over and all the moms knew exactly what I meant and were all, "Uh-huh!!" I'm excited for mommy groups, we're going to try and do about 1 a week.

The Easter Bunny

One of my friends commented to me that Holidays are going to be fun all over again for Lance and I. She is so right on about that, I am actually looking forward to Easter this year. Which is a peculiar Holiday for me to be excited about. I can't even remember the last time I colored eggs or did anything even remotely resembling celebrating Easter. This  year though, I've got our egg coloring kit all ready to go. I can't wait for Lance and I to color eggs with Hannah for the first time. I know she isn't going to remember or really participate, but it'll be fun for us anyway. And Hannah has started to notice colors and things, so she may even look at an egg...

Today I took her to the mall to see the Easter Bunny and she did great. She wasn't entirely sure about the bunny but sat on his lap anyway. There was no smiling, but at least there was no screaming! Then we stopped to chat with a friend who had a booth at the mall show and did some more walking around. She was being a really good baby and getting pet by many a mall-goer. So many stopped to tell me what a pretty baby she was, awwww :) But as I was at the sprint store looking at phones, she started to squak a little and before I knew it she had completely lost her shit. No amount of mommy love would pull her out of it. And unfortunately, the mall has those high ceilings and no carpeting so her yelling really echoed. I had people looking at us and I'm sure they were wondering what I was doing to my baby to make her make such a noise. We hurried out to the car as quickly as we could because I knew as soon as I got her in the car seat and the car started to move she'd be okay. I was right, we hadn't even gotten out of the parking lot before all became right in her world and she quieted right down.

Each stop light we came to though, she let out a few half-hearted squaks like, don't you dare stop this car or I swear, I'll loose my shit again! We got home and it was like nothing was ever wrong, she was her usual smiling self. I think she was just a bit over-stimulated by all the lights and things to look at that she got tired and then pissed off that her bed wasn't there when she was tired. 

Bibs?

I had a revelation yesterday. 

After a week or so of lots of spitting up (from Hannah, not me) when previously there had been little to none, I finally realized why people had given us so many bibs. Each time I would open a gift and see bibs, inside I would think....huh, bibs, great - she'll be eating and need bibs, oh when she's 6 months old. So, I open up the bib drawer - yep bibs have their own drawer because we have such a crazy amount of them. I open the drawer and slap a bib on baby. It catches the spit up and I don't have to change her clothes! Awesome! When people give new parents bibs, they should really explain why :)

I'm trying to figure out what I've introduced into my diet that she is not digging. I've already had to cut out cheese and milk. I used to eat LOTS of cheese and milk on a regular basis but had to let it go because Hannah's little tummy can't digest cow's milk at this age. Our doula had warned me of the problems babies can have with cow's milk but until I saw it I didn't really believe her. So away went the cheese...that was sad. I love me some cheese. I have started having a latte in the evenings and I'm wondering if it is the coffee (decaf of course) or the 1/3 cup of milk I make it with. Either way, gotta cut it out to see if it makes her feel better. One thing I do eat that she doesn't mind at all is spinach...it turns her poop neon green. LOL

This morning because she's been so spitty uppy, I kept her in her jammies longer than I usually do thinking 1 less outfit change. I'd of course already forgotten my bib revelation of yesterday. So, when I decided to get her dressed I picked out one of her cute little dresses with a long sleeved onesie and little tights underneath. I got all of this on her and buttoned and scooped her up off the table to admire her, when she blew. She projectiled over my shoulder. Pour Eleanor thought the sky was falling, she skittered around trying to get out of the way, but of course some got on her before she could flee to safety. Franklin sauntered over to lick up what had landed on the floor like, mmm what's this coming from the sky? I laid Hannah back down on the table and proceeded to remove the clothes I had just put on....this time, I remembered to cover the clean outfit with a bib. So far, we've changed the bib 4 times, and her outfit has been saved!!! LOVE a bib.

Henry-isms

It is SO nice outside today I couldn't wait for Lance to get home and start removing the storms. Most of the windows have the old school wood frame storms that actually hang on the windows, not the 'new fangled' slide up storm windows. The front porch ones are easy enough for me to remove though, so I pulled a couple off and rather than go hunt down the screens to match, I pulled out a couple of those temporary screens. I wasn't thinking too much about it, but I should have known better. Baby Henry has been at that screen trying to escape for the last 15 minutes...luckily this window is a much tighter fit than the kitchen window from last summer. So, he is just sitting by the window now, howling because he needs outside THAT badly. Freak.

I've mentioned before how Henry will follow us into the bathroom, jump into the sink and proceed to poke us with his paw until we pet him and then turn on the faucet. That's old news now, he's trained us so well we really don't think about it anymore, it is just second nature. But yesterday Lance forgot how the game goes and ignored Henry. Henry kept poking him with his paw - tap tap tap on the shoulder. After a few taps and no response from Lance, Henry leaned in and bit Lance on the shoulder! I believe that is kitty for, "pay attention to me you bastard!"

I was going to post after Valentine's Day but never actually got around to it. Lance and I had a fabulous dinner. Hannah was such a good little baby that she slept nice and sound in her stroller while he and I sat down to dinner at the table. A nice change from woofing down supper on the couch while holding her with one hand so she doesn't fuss! We had a special meal that we hadn't had in years - beef medallions in red wine and shallot sauce, YUM - followed up by home-made crepes. Back in the day, the first dessert I made for Lance was crepes :)

And I've been starting to do some more advertising with my business. Time to start bringing in some serious money. We got my car sold, which is great! But we had to make up the difference in what we got for it compared to what was actually left on the loan. Bummer. But at least that payment is gone as is the insurance payment. So we're back down to a single car family....we'd made one car work for us for many years, so I know we can do it. It will just be a little different now that there is a baby in the mix.

Hannah goes to her 2 month checkup this week. She's doing all the things the books say she should be so I'm sure she'll get a gold star. It is just amazing to have this little baby that we made and to be able to watch her grow. I gave her a bath just a few minutes ago and it was just the sweetest thing. She sat in her tub smiling up at me the whole time with this look on her face that seemed to say "Ahhh, I love my mom".

I quit

I went to work yesterday for show and tell with Hannah. Everyone who wanted to, got to hold her and love her and coo to her - then I broke the news. I'm not coming back to work from maternity leave. Lance and I gave it lots and lots of thought and we're going to try our best to make this work. 

I was nervous about giving notice because I like my job there a lot and I liked the opportunity to go back to school for free. My hope is that in a few years when Hannah goes to school I can go back to working there in some capacity. Before I went on maternity leave, I had put together a proposal to allow me to work from home at least a few days a week. It sounded like a great idea to me, but I got a no. It's too bad really because now they have to find someone new to train all over again to replace me. But that's okay, I'm excited about my new full time job as a mommy. Already I've gotten the best reward ever - complete and total recognition in the form of a genuine smile when I speak to her or go to pick her up.

Both Lance and I were raised either by babysitters or just left alone to fend for ourselves. Nothing against babysitters, it is what works for many many families. And I have some great memories of the two babysitters I can remember. They happened to live across the street from one another. One was an old grandma kind of lady whose house smelled funny. One was a mom of two other kids so I always had tons of neat toys to play with. I also remember spending time in the tavern with my Dad. I remember going into the office mom worked with her. I remember I was always being watched by someone, I used to throw a stink about having to have a babysitter - why couldn't I just watch myself?? But, knowing what I know now, I am very grateful to have had someone watching me. I'm glad I wasn't left alone. 

We were both raised differently but still turned out okay :) But we still very much agree that we want to be the ones to raise our baby. A babysitter will be great for the nights out and stuff, but the day to day business, Hannah will be watched my Lance or myself. And Hannah will not be left alone to take care of herself until she is quite a bit older. I'd have to ask mom, but I'm thinking I wasn't allowed alone until like 11 or 12, and even then it was only for short bursts, definitely not during the evening/night. Lance got more freedom than I did, he was a good boy (so his folks thought) at a young age and so was left alone much earlier. 

But all this means we have to sacrifice. We're selling our 2nd car, we're cutting out all the niceties we've come to enjoy, and I'm trying to get a home business going. Depending how things go, I may have to get a part time job for evenings and weekends which would significantly cut down on time Lance and I spend together, but we know it will be worth it. I don't know how often I hear from people "they grow so fast - you'll never get these first years back - when you're old and grey, you're never going to say I wish I worked more when my kids were young."

Wish us luck, this is going to be a huge change and adjustment for both of us. I'm nervous about it, but at the same time, I couldn't be more at peace with our decision. I know things will work out somehow.

Franklin and Hannah

Their first picture together - he crawled up on the couch to lay next to me as she was feeding so I took the opportunity to prop her up against him. He didn't even flinch. I see the two of them being like those emails that get forwarded around. A little baby all curled up on a 200lb dog :)

What do I do with myself all day?

I make milk, I nurse Hannah, I change her, I soothe her, I play with her, and I love every minute of it! So far, I've been lucky to get a shower in every day, most days I can even straighten up around the house. 

Some days she feeds every hour, some days she feeds every two hours - so there is a lot of time spent hanging on my boob. I've been doing as much reading on breast feeding as I can and our doula has been a good source of information too. Babies who nurse, don't get as full as babies who eat formula and food so they want to eat more frequently. Sometimes it can get exhausting when I don't feel like I've gotten enough sleep. But then I look at her and I realize how much I really do enjoy being her source of nutritious milk. Yesterday I was actually able to get a crock pot meal made and was pretty proud of myself to have supper ready for Lance when he got home. I know he appreciated it.

So what I do with myself all day is take care of a baby. I have realized how much I love taking care of her, my inner nurturer has come out and now I know what others mean when they say they would do ANYThing for their kids.

All by our own-selves

Hannah and I not only survived our first week home alone together, we excelled! Okay, maybe not excelled, but certainly did pretty good. Monday was tough though, there was no Lance to hand her off to for the 'your turn' time after feedings. It only took a few days for me to figure things out and get some semblance of a routine down. I can't really use the word routine yet though because she is still learning. Sometimes she naps in the mornings, sometimes she naps in the afternoons - but there is always a good chunk of time where she doesn't want to nap but would rather have some talk time. We look at each other and I tell her stories, and then she smiles and coos back. She seems to have a lot to say.

We had a visit from Grandma Carol on Thursday and she brought us lunch! It's always nice when people bring food :) But Hannah is definitely getting to know her Grandma Carol, she has seen her several times already. She won't get to see her other Grandmas for quite a few weeks yet though.

Yesterday, our doula Amanda, came over for a bit of a follow-up, see how we're doing visit. She seemed pretty pleased with how Hannah is growing and how we seem to be doing, so that was good to hear. Funny part about that visit was that we had put Eleanor away and left Franklin out. That's usually what we do with the dogs, Franklin is just more calm and friendly with visitors, so he gets to stay out and say hello. Lance and him were sitting on one couch, Amanda and I were on the other one. I'd passed Hannah over to Amanda and she was holding her talking to her and Hannah was loving it. A couple times though, Hannah would let out a bit of a squawk and Lance said each time, Franklin tried to get off the couch to go see what Amanda was doing to his baby! So far, it has been Eleanor who has shown the protective interest in the baby, not really Franklin. So, that was kinda neat - he would never aggressively go after anybody, but just to see that he wanted to go help his squawking baby was cool. 

Hannah is going to grow up with some very great animals. Eleanor likes to give her a little gentle kiss every now and then and Franklin likes to put his nose right up to her and sniff. I'm so glad things are going well with the dogs and baby. They are, after all, our babies too!

2 weeks and counting

I missed the 2 week date, but am pretty close. Hannah is 2 weeks and 3 days old. It's amazing how quickly time flies...even though all it seems like I'm doing it pulling out and putting away the boobs, the days and nights get away from me before I know it. I know some of the seasoned mothers are able to nurse and do things with their hands at the same time - that multi-tasking maneuver will take me awhile to achieve. In fact, there are times when I think I could use an extra hand just to keep her latched on and her flailing limbs out of the way.

Hannah had her 2 week check up on Friday and she weighed 8lbs, 12 ounces. So she gained 8 pounds in the week since her last doctor appointment! That makes me feel great because it means she is nursing well :) One of the tricky parts of nursing is to make sure they're gaining enough weight and that was one of my concerns, but looks like we're doing okay there. Doctor said everything else with her looks excellent, no problems, no concerns. 

Lance goes back to work tomorrow and I'm pretty sad about that. It has been so great having him home with us all day. Partly because it's been a comfort knowing there is another body in the house if I need help with anything. But, mostly because our new little family has had this time to bond together. 

1 week old

Our little daughter is one week old today. How strange to hear myself say 'daughter'! This week has absolutely flown by, I can't believe it. It really does just feel like it's been a couple days.

We came home from the hospital on Saturday afternoon and put in place our previously discussed "lock down". Talking with other new mommies and doing some readings, some lockdowns can go on for as long as a week or more. We decided to just go with 2 days. Thinking back, I think I would have been okay with a whole week :) We took those 2 days though to try and establish some sense of routine or at least figure out what we were doing.

I think we did and are doing great. Really all she does is eat, poop, and sleep but she does all of those things aLOT. Lance and I both have spent pretty much this whole week in jammy pants, it's just easier. We decided to nurse, so I've been trying to get that figured out and under control. I think between Hannah and I, we're getting it worked out quite nicely. During the day, it will vary from every 1-2 hours she feeds. At night, sweet little thing that she is, will vary from 3-4 hours between feedings. My inner mommy has come out and while I sleep heavy and hard, it is also a light enough sleep that I can hear her rooting around before she wakes up so I know it's time to scoop her up again. I may wake up a little grudgingly at first, but as soon as I see her pretty little face looking at me all I can do is coo at her.

The during the day nursings though make it a little tricky to do things. I've got a really small window of time to do things before she is hungry again. If she's fallen asleep, I get the full 2 hours. If she is kept awake I only get about 1 hour. Already I've figured that out! :) 

And speaking of, my window of time is now up-

She got born!

I haven't blogged for quite awhile. Mainly because there towards the end, all I could think of was how uncomfortable and miserable I was. Nobody needs to hear me whine about that. I went in for my regular OB appointment on Dec. 24th and the doc said I was still just dialated to 2, no change. I waited until he left the room, but then I lost it a little bit. I was really really hoping for a change and that we could get this baby out. Lance has become an expert soother throughout my pregnancy, I am a very lucky woman to have him :) 

So, it was Christmas Eve, we were tired of just waiting and feeling kind of bored so we thought we'd just exchange gifts a day early. I'm glad we did because as it turns out, we were quite busy on Christmas!! I'd written this up on her baby page, so I'm just going to be lazy and copy/paste it here. It's more of a blog post anyway:

Behind the name, Hannah Louisa Ruby Koch:

We had chosen her name many months ago but would not share the name with anyone. She is a lucky girl to have two very meaningful middle names. Louisa is for my Dad who passed away just a couple weeks before I found out I was pregnant. Ruby is for Lance’s Grandma who passed away last summer. Hannah’s first name is just one Lance and I decided on because we really liked it. Looking back through our family trees, it is also a name that has cropped up generations ago.

Her birth:

Hannah was born at 2:19 p.m. on December 25th 2008. She weighed 8 lbs, 4 ounces and was 19 inches long. A perfectly round head and no bruising, a beautiful little girl! 

I woke up Christmas morning around 7 feeling a little off. It took me awhile to realize, I was having contractions, and I was having them every 2 minutes. Lance called the doula right away, she suggested I drink a bunch of water, move around, eat some breakfast and let her know of any changes. That maybe these were fake contractions and we’d see how it goes. I drank a bunch of water and decided these were the real thing and we’d better prepare for a day full of labor, so I got into the shower, thinking I should be clean for whatever the day brings - Lance called our doula back because the contractions were still at every two minutes and getting more and more strong. I was beginning to howl a little. As he was talking to her, I was walking the hallway, breathing. Franklin was very concerned with what was wrong with me and every time I’d stop because of a contraction, he’d position himself in front of me so I could lean forward on him. When I’d start walking again, he’d come up along side me for a little extra support. 

When Lance got off the phone with the doula he said she recommended we head into the hospital and she’d meet us there. I continued huffing around while he gathered up all the things we’d prepared for this very day. We got to the hospital around 8am and I was definitely feeling the contractions, they were strong. The nurses checked me in, saw I was dilated to 4 and gave me a room. My contractions never varied from every 2 minutes, so I was laboring quickly and strongly right off the bat. Amanda (our doula) got there and between her and Lance they were a great help in keeping me focused and away from the epidural or pain meds. The doctor wanted to break my water for me, but I resisted because I didn’t want any interventions if at all possible.

It wasn’t too long after that though that the doctor came back and told me I had pre-eclampsia and had it severely. Normally, if women have it they’ll have 1 of the problems associated with it, lucky me - I had 2. He said I would be okay, but that we’d need to move things along as quickly as possible. He broke my water, and I continued to labor. Around 1-ish, I really started feeling the need to push. I was dilated to 9.5 and they wouldn’t let me yet, so I had to try and stop by body from naturally pushing. Way easier said than done. Thinking back on some of the noises I made, that hospital HAS to have sound proof walls. I remember just screaming in agony and hearing Lance and Amanda trying to bring me back to calm breathing. Sometimes they were able to reign me in, other times I just had to scream. Not once did I curse out anyone like in the movies though :) Finally I was able to push and after 40 minutes of pushing, out popped little Hannah. I had a surprisingly quick labor and delivery, but given my condition it was best. 

They took Hannah away immediately because she had pooped inside me and so they were concerned about the poop being in her mouth, nose, etc. so I wasn’t able to hold her right away. But while they worked on her, the doctor continued to work on me. The placenta wasn’t coming out but massive amounts of blood were. I really don’t know how long it took him, but it seemed like forever for him to get all the random pieces of placenta out. Finally, I was able to hold our baby and everything I’d just gone through was put into perspective. To realize that little baby girl had just come OUT of me....whoa.

Hannah was doing wonderfully, no complications, no problems at all. Unfortunately, they couldn’t say the same for me. I was put on a Magnesium drip to help repair my liver and get my platelet count back up to where it should be. Mine was 40,000 and it is supposed to be 150,000. As the magnesium took hold, I could feel reality slipping away. I became more and more tired and weak. I was able to eat a little but chewing became so tiring. It was about this time that we had our first visitors to the hospital. One of the proud sets of Grandparents came to see their first grandchild. Their visit didn’t last too long but long enough that I was worn out by the end of it.

I had a rough night and next day. They wouldn’t remove the Magnesium until 24 hours on it had passed and it was another 12 hours before I really felt able enough to walk and move around again. The doctors were pleased enough with my recovery that we were released Saturday afternoon. I still have to go back for further testing to make sure I am A-OK, but am just delighted to be home again and with a beautiful little girl to boot.